There are so many thoughts and emotions whirling around in my mind right now! I’m getting married in 4 days. I’m so excited and happy and ready for this, but this week has been hard. It’s been my last Christmas as a Bradshaw. It was my last “normal” Lord’s Day at Heritage. It was the last time I would get to sing with the ensemble. It’s my last night in my own bed. It was my last Advent devotionals with my family. It’s the last few games I’ll play with my siblings, aunt, and grandmother. It was the last time I’ll get to use the monogrammed “B” stationary I got last year. Really, I’m down to minutes now. These are my last few minutes at home. I really am happy and excited, but it really has been a hard week. I have spent a good portion of most of these days on the verge of tears.

I wanted to share this quote again. I think it really says it quite nicely. It’s been on my sidebar for years, and it will stay there as a good reminder to me. The link to the rest of the article is over there.

Don’t hope to fall in love, but be willing to love those you are serving. Love is not an emotion, but rather a matter of the will. Love is kind–a learned response of the heart when others are unkind.

Love is a commitment–dying to self–a life of giving. An attitude of serving. A heart that is kind, compassionate, and caring in spite of the circumstances.

I packed all my clothes, all my sewing stuff, all my blankets, coats, jewelry, shoes… Pretty much anything that’s going to IL is packed now. I’m living out of suitcases for the next few weeks, and then I’ll be living in IL. I won’t be coming home to unpack, not to this home. I’ll be up north striving to better love and serve (which really are one and the same) Sam as we set up a home of our own. It is my constant prayer that I would be the helpmeet he needs me to be, constantly changing into something better and better for him. It’s going to be the grandest adventure I’ve ever had, and I’m looking forward to it immensely. But for right now, I’m a bit sad. And that’s okay. I’m going to miss my family and my church family more than I can possibly express!

So that’s what’s going on right now. Happiness, excitement, sadness… Joy, peace, love. And what seems to crown it all is a profound gratitude for the blessings that God has poured out on ever part of my life. He is truly wonderful.

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