I don’t know what it is. I’m drawn to write. Pulled in and convinced to type out my thoughts here, on this blog. Not because anyone will read it. Not for any reason in particular, except maybe to sort things out in my own mind. Why? I don’t know.
First of all, let me say that I feel incredibly inadequate or under-qualified to write about this, but it’s where I’m at right now. It’s all I think about right now. With that “disclaimer”, here you go:
I’m just a girl in a long-distance relationship (I feel kind of defined by that right now.). But I’m blessed more than many girls in long-distance relationships. My long-distance relationship is short-lived, and I have gotten to be with my man most weekends. Nevertheless, I feel like I’ve learned a lot. You know all those blog posts by other engaged girls who have lived through long-distance relationships? Well, turns out, they’re spot on. I never really believed them. But then again, I never really believed I’d live to prove them right or wrong. What have I learned? Let me try to shorten this by listing some things (these are not all, of course, just the ones that I could actually put into words):
- It’s not easy. No matter how independent you were before entering this relationship, if you’re anything like me, you’ll want to be with him. Period. End of story. Being separated by a forbidding distance is the hardest aspect of the relationship (in my mind).
- Communication. Yeah, every post by every couple always emphasizes this. They’re right though. We all know it. I believe long-distance relationships need this even more though. For me and Sam, some days all we have is email or text (and thank goodness we do have these!), and we go at it fiercely. 😉 We ask each other questions about anything and everything. We remind each other of our love. We discuss wedding details. I’m not sure there’s a topic we haven’t discussed over chat, text, or email! To sum up: when you think you’ve said everything in every possible way, say it one more time. It’s far better to over-communicate. I love you, Sam!!!
- It changes everything. No, really. It does. It did for me, anyway. Look, getting married … it’s the biggest decision you’ll ever make in your entire life! It’s exciting. It’s terrifying. It’s stressful. It’s wonderful. All that and so much more, all at the same time! I’m still me, but I’ve vowed to become part of someone else now. That. Is. HUGE. So, yes, I’ve changed dramatically, but I am still me. I’m still trying to figure that one out. To say I’m surprised by myself would be the understatement of the century…
- Savor the moments. When we’re together, Sam and I do a pretty good job making the most of it, I think. We have fun (he pokes me… I run or collapse into the fetal position. It’s a very one-sided bit of fun; I’m learning his weaknesses though! ;)). We take walks where we do more chatting about anything and everything. We are learning each other, and it is beyond wonderful, past amazing, indescribably awesome. And sometimes just being together is enough. Awkward silences? There have been none. And that’s saying a lot coming from me!
- Always remember Who and why. Throughout the whole whirlwind process of my non-courtship and engagement, I have been blessed with amazing peace. I never questioned whether what I was embarking upon was the right thing, or whether I was doing it with the right person. God’s Hand has been evident in and through everything. This would not be were it not His doing. So my job now is to remember the why. Why are we getting married? For HIS glory. What is the purpose of our marriage, of our life? His glory.